Thank You!!

Thanks ever so much for the GNO gift, PNN friends! When my Thanksgiving guests are gushing over such a wonderful treat, I'll definitely earn a "fav hostess" badge, but unfortunately, I won't be able to properly display that - cuz thems are bras, aren't they?

Your pet's carbon footprint is bigger than my SUV's?

According to authors, Robert and Brenda Vale, your pet dog leaves a footprint bigger than an SUV. Their book, Time to Eat the Dog? The Real Guide to Sustainable Living, lays out a good argument and raises some questions and maybe some dander. In a country where Green living is becoming politically correct, how far will people go to be "green"? Will this change how most view pet ownership? Should it?

You can read more about it in the New Scientist.

About global warming

It's true we should be good stewards of the earth. We should make efforts to reduce greenhouse gasses, conserve energy, be less wasteful. Because those are good things to do. We should learn moderation. But, how do you feel about legislation based primarily on what seems to be a one-sided argument? And what do we do with stories like this that carry a different set of facts regarding global warming?

That growl you hear is me

Though I'm frustrated with Mr. Immelt, I bought a front-loading energy saver GE washing machine, to replace my junk Whirlpool Gold that was barely 7 years old.  The new one was delivered this morning. After a brief test and some instructions the delivery personnel left and I felt giddy with a new washer.

I quickly gathered a load of blue jeans tossed them in the machine, clipped open the sample packet of Tide HE, poured it into the reservoir, made the proper selections and pushed start. I tinkered with the new buttons a little and decided it was a very cool appliance. From time to time I peered into the machine and wondered if it was working right. There didn't appear to be much activity inside it.

An hour later when the load was supposed to be finished, it wasn't. It merely hummed. Thinking I must have tinkered too much pushing the new buttons, I turned the machine off and started over. An hour later, nothing but a hummmm. Exactly how I felt. I unplugged the machine, plugged it back in and set it to rinse and spin. An hour later, nothing plus a hummmm. No longer exactly how I felt. Instead I wanted to have an adult "I'm sick already of spending money on high end merchandise that doesn't work" tantrum.

I call GE. I call Lowe's. Though I'm tempted I don't call names and I'm very polite. But, dagflippitynabbit, I'm really ticked! I want a new machine and I want it now! GE and Whirlpool I have a message for you:  PPPPLLLLLLBTTTTTTHHHHHHHHH!!!

CASH for fridges?

Are you considering replacing a major aplliance any time soon? The imperfect "Cash for clunkers" program designed to help stimualte the US econmy will be replaced with the "Cash for appliances" type program. To qualify, the appliance must be an energy efficient item. So, my PNN pals if you're considering replacing a major appliance and can hold off for a month or so, do it! You can read more about here. I'm sooooo tickled Ed and I opted to wait a few weeks on the fridge we were going to purchase when we bought the washer. Anyone else plan to take advantage of this?

Progress. And why is my whirlpool gold washing machine broke

When it occurred to me that the washing machine had been washing the same load of laundry for about four hours, I felt that sinking feeling you get when you have to replace an appliance, but you'd rather spend money on something you've really been wanting. Like new living furniture or a new floor, new suit, small diamond, GPS, very nice dinner out or a night away in *that cabin - anything but a washing machine!

Sure enough, when I lifted the lid, the water looked dark and fuzzy. Ed's nice blue jacket looked equally fuzzy. It's not the cool kind of red fuzzy look I'm seeing in JC Penney's Big and Tall.

Someone tell me why appliances aren't made like they once were. So what if there were no no pulse options, buzzers, slow spin, extra rinse or delicate agitating cycle on those old washing machines? At least the giagandamonious  boogers lasted 20 years!

Our 7-year old washing machine needs replaced! Seven years? That's all you can get out of a washing machine these days? Techincally we could spend over 200 more bucks for another repair, but what a money sink. It's a Whirlpool Gold top loading super size. I guess "Gold" isn't a guarantee, much to my chagrin. Two years ago, I think we spent over 200 bucks replacing a part that was made of plastic. When I mentioned to the repairman that the parts aren't made very durably, he informed me the part was made of plastic so it would break to prevent the stress going to the motor. Heh. It all had something to do with the drum getting thrown off balance.

Back in the day, when a load of laundry threw the drum off balance, the entire house rattled, the washing machine scooted and shifted positions or danced across the floor, but it never broke! Apparently they didn't need plastic parts back then. 

And if washing machines have to be made so they'll break, then why do the parts have to cost SO much? This makes no sense to me. I don't have time to waste shopping for a washing machine that will stand the test of time or off balance loads of laundry or have parts that don't cost more than a  small diamond, a very nice dinner out, a new suit, new microwave or GPS!

Come Tuesday when the appliance store arrives to deliver things that will likely break in 7 years or less, I'll be thinking of the old wringer washing machine Grandma once used and how it lasted and lasted. Yup the cost of progress.

Got a story?

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

There must be some great credit card stories among our PNN ladies! Help me out here, will yas? I don’t really have a great credit card story for Regina Brett’s number 5 on the list. I thought about writing a piece of fiction, and then opted to solicit your help. Here’s the plan: Tell me your story and I’ll load an image to pair it with. Humor always welcome!

Zingers

4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does. *

All my friends had gotten their driver's license when they were in their teens. But me, I was long since an adult in my 20's married and with children. When I arrived to the Bureau Department of Motor Vehicles all grown up and ready to conquer the world, I put my thinking cap on backwards, but smiled with big fake confidence.

Back in the day the drivers tests consisting of a two fold exam:  oral and driving test. An officer in the BMV usually administered them. I was lucky enough to meet with an arrogant officer. And, of course, I acted very composed, mature and mostly dismissed his arrogance even though my stomach twisted into knots.

The officer followed me outside. We buckled ourselves into my grandmothers little car. I maneuvered the cones, parallel parking and stop signs well enough to pass.  Next, the officer escorted me into the office for the final portion of the drivers test. It felt like an interrogation, but I stayed composed. Everything moved along nicely until he asked me to name the X sign. To which I replied, "It's a Zing sign". 

"What?" the officer asked.

"It's a Zing," I repeated.

His laughter felt uncomfortable. But, when it morphed into an endless mad guffaw, I wanted to stick my fist into his gaping mouth. Instead I waited for him to run out of air. Finally he caught his breath  and asked, "What the hec's a zing?"

I thought, "Laughing fool ....and they let officers this clueless administer road tests and carry weapons?"

"Well, it's a crossing," I said.

"Why didn't you call it a crossing then?" he laughed again.

The truth? I always thought an Xing was pronounced Zing. I passed the oral test, but went home feeling stupid and horrified. Who knew Xing really didn't mean Zing? Well, derrr, me for one. And it bothered me for years! Yes, years. Until one day I realized what a silly thing - to harbor a silly thing. My little zinger likely became great fodder for funny stories the officer retold over and over. He probably meant no harm when he laughed, but I took it all wrong.

Have you allowed a silly or insignificant thing to make you feel insecure or stupid?

* Quoted from Regina Brett's 45 life lessons and 5 to grow on

e

I received a forwarded email this week from a friend. Admittedly, many forwarded emails I receive end up in the trash bin unopened, but this one looked interesting. Although the email had some inaccurate details and/or left some out, my Snopes search returned the original story about a columnist who penned a list of life lessons in celebration of growing older. As I read the list, my shoulders relaxed and my view widened. My heart warmed at the bigger pictures which flashed in my mind with each line and for the first time in a long time, the notion of aging seemed less formidable. 

I wondered if I made a list how it might read and concluded it would likely be similar to the columnist’s list. Over the coming weeks, I’ll be posting stories and memories the 45 lessons evoked in my mind along with images I hope will inspire you as much as Regina Brett’s list inspired me.


1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

His mom calls him “e” and I like the originality. He’s 3 years old - bright, cute, busy, happy, fun – and very sick. E’s become quite special to me although we’ve never met. Every day I check the updates his mother posts and pray the news is good. My hope for him increases each time I read an encouraging report. And when the news isn’t favorable, my heart sinks and I wonder how his mother must feel. 

My children are healthy. We’ve had fevers, infections, injuries, stitches and/or asthmas and allergies. I spent many sleepless nights cleaning up vomit or the other, but daylight never greeted me with a punch in the gut like a pediatrician’s grave report must surely deliver.

Looking at the pictures of e enjoying his life in spite of the needles, chemo, tests, drugs, tubes and other things most of us don’t have regular intimate relationships with, behooves me to cultivate contentment with such blessings as I have - which are vast.

Fair isn’t a variable in e’s life. It’s a meaningless, non-relative word that will neither improve his health nor affect a cure. Every morning he wakes up is a new day to live and explore within the limitations of an illness, which doesn’t negotiate.

Today the news appears encouraging. The surgeon didn’t think the spot he removed from e’s lung looked like a tumor. This brings him one step closer to the needed transplant. Although I haven’t asked e’s mom, I’m guessing she believes life is good.

Life Ain't Bad

I awake feeling grateful the moon didn't tumble into the oceans while I slept. I'm grateful for the sun, which sits in a sky that didn't fall during the night. I feel grateful at the safekeeping of the entire universe.

I saunter down the steps, open the front door and find the birds chirping, flowers blooming, trees still rooted in the ground and the right amount of oxygen in the air to keep us all alive. I walk to the kitchen sink to fill the coffee pot, and notice through the pane the buildings in the distance appear in tact and standing tall. I can tell it's going to be a good day.

My son arrives at the breakfast bar famished. I watch him attack his food as if he hadn't eaten in days while I pack his lunch and glance out at the deck. The menace squirrel scurries around looking for the tall leaf bags he tore into for days. His partner in crime digs in my fresh-mulched flowerbed until a robin chases them off. The neighbor's dog yaps and yaps and yaps.

My boy' s departing hug lingers long after he steps off the front stoop, moseys down the walk and disappears around the corner. I pray for his safekeeping. The neighbor boy walks his dog across the grassy mound and vanishes leaving the canine traces behind. I frown. A middle school girl in high-heeled clodhoppers with an odd gait ambles down the middle of the street.

Husband meets me at the bottom of the stairs in his warm smile and I bask in our quiet time together before he leaves for the office. Everything seems normal in a regular like kind of way. The best part of waking from a bad dream: realizing life is good.

Morning Coffee

I look forward to the first cup of morning coffee almost as much I look forward to seeing my boy come through the door from school each day. Both make me jubilant. The anticipation livens my day.

I like crème with my coffee and a teaspoon of sugar. Nothing else - except maybe a dollop of real whipped crème. But, nothing more - no toast, cereal or protein bar. Food comes later. Besides, too many things need tackled in the morning like email, Twitter updates and the ten Word docs I left open on my desktop the night before.

Each weekday morning, I observe the same routine, like it's a religious holiday. Once I saunter down stairs, I grind the coffee beans and pack David's lunch. We chat while he eats breakfast and the coffee brews. Occasionally, I tell some way good jokes and he laughs. I pour my coffee, kiss his face and sneak in a sideways hug before he dashes out the door. I sip my coffee on the stoop until he rounds the corner and disappears from my hen-like sight.  

I can hardly wait to get to my desk. A tickle starts in my tummy and lands in my toes as I dash to my office. The prospect of great things happening under my fingertips excites me. The creative juices start flowing. Each sip of coffee gives me added inspiration to tap out the next line. I love coffee!

Lately, I've been having some issues with my morning coffee. First, it was electrical problems every morning with my coffee. Then it was kid issues with my coffee. This week - water heater problems with my coffee.

But, the hot water tank is still under warranty. The customer service rep said the recalled replacement parts were free and I could collect them at Lowe's. And best of all I could install the parts myself because instructions were included. All six pages of instructions to be exact. I pictured myself overcome with gas vapors sprawled on the basement floor, face down in spilled coffee, wrench in hand.

The technician from the Water Heater Company likely outperformed himself replacing the recalled parts in 15 minutes or less today. Electrical problems - gone. Hot water heater problems and 125 bucks - gone. Kid problems? Could be having some of those with my coffee for a while.

I'm looking forward to my first cup tomorrow morning almost as much I look forward to seeing my boy come through the door from school, assuming he doesn't arrive with a giant spider on his back...err a girl clinging to his arm. Lord knows most anything is better with my coffee than trouble.

The Black Box

Wives, girlfriends, fiancés and partners across the heartland will browse magazines at grocery checkouts, interview friends or search online for Valentine's ideas this week. Like me, they'll read a plethora of too corny, too expensive or too whatever suggestions for the perfect romantic Valentines Day. At best, a handful of ideas will make us salivate or trigger some other physiological response. More than likely a result of flipping or clicking page after page of luscious Valentine spreads flaunting decadent cheesecakes or chocolate yummies.

Some years ago, I planned the most indulgent Valentines surprise ever in my life. It didn't include a return trip to the beautiful Inn at Cedar Falls where Ed had swept me off months prior for a romantic getaway.

Nor did I plan any other kind of trip. It entailed weeks of preparation, searching, arranging and writing. Of all the wonderful trips, vacations, dinners and events that Ed and I planned, nothing topped Hocking Hills where we rung in the New Year together in a charming 1800's tin-roof cabin nestled above a deep ravine replete with babbling brook woven around tall hemlocks and hickorys. I wanted a romantic Valentine's Day that felt as warm as December 31^st by the firebox on a quaint sofa in those isolated hills.

On Valentine's Day, however, our house looked nothing like the cabin in the hills. No mountains or ravines graced our backyard. But, I found an adorable close mini replica of the cabin. Its humble elegance imposed a subtle reminder of our cabin get away and added charm to my table centerpiece beside the candles, chocolate hearts and lace. I remembered "the card" (another story), which stood alongside a black box secured with a heart lock. Finding the key required Ed's scavenger skill. Of course, it worked up an incredible appetite, which transitioned perfectly into dinner. I served the identical eats, drinks and dessert we shared on the first night in the cabin get away. Our Valentine evening didn't end with the bubbly rose-petal soak following dinner. 

 I didn't need the tips from a magazine or book to make our Heart day so special. Turned out LHJ didn't know my lover as well as I did. By the way, the rose petals were not nearly as romantic in my bath as they appeared in TV and magazines. When we emerged from the water they stuck to every part of our body and in our hair and stained the sheets.

The little black box with a heart lock has made an appearance around February 14^th most every year since. One detail, (well, a few details actually) extrapolated from a well-planned Valentines event has set the stage for all our Valentine's Days. And I plucked the gems from a special night in our lives that we never wanted to end. Amazing what one day can mean in a lifetime!

Last night as I dusted and polished the box, I wondered what Ed might find in it this February 14^th.  If you had a black box, what treasures might it contain?

The Liberal Glacier

The Washington Post published a succinct article written by George Will several years ago titled, A Case for Conservatism. What a pity the article was not picked up by the McCain operation and used in his campaign because the conservative message was not adequately articulated. Though Sarah Palin energized the base in spades, McCain needed to draw more democrats further to the center and center right, which clearly did not happen.

By today's "everything is relative" standards John F. Kennedy was a conservative. But the relative speak worth espousing here is the relative distance of the new president elect  from the principles of JFK.

Two of many defining values JFK advocated were that Americans should 1. Serve a cause bigger than themselves e.g. don't ask the government what it can do for you, and 2. Americans should not be considered on the basis of race, religion etc. Yet those two values have been turned upside down and twisted by his party today. The Dems have redefined "ask not" and "affirmative action" which, ironically he coined.

What a conundrum that liberal politicians reject values, which JFK embraced yet portray an alliance with him. George Will hit the proverbial nail when he wrote that, "You serve your country by embracing a spacious and expanding sphere of life for which your country is not responsible".

But, the Dems embrace ideology which partly rests on the premise that everything must be fair. That fallacy has to some degree permeated the independent and conservative base and feeds the entitlement mentality. Everything is not fair, nor can or will be because fairness is not an entitlement. It's a tall order to distribute fairness. How is it that any party should have such hubris to proclaim it should be administrators of it? Furthermore, it is evident where a party's values lie when it implies spreading wealth is the epitome of fairness. It is repulsive to debase Americans with such poppycock. Some liberals are redefining the values JFK supported.

George Will nailed the arguments as one of freedom versus equality. It may be an over simplification to assert that if you are more concerned about freedom than equality, you are more conservative than liberal. But, it might be an easy way to gauge where you are on the political spectrum. Americans have an intrinsic level of equality just being American. To some extent equality already exists.

From the liberal perspective, if someone competes in a business and does not succeed, it is likely due to inequality rather than general skills, abilities or capitalization. Or if a certain individual belongs to an ethnic group and his business fails, liberals want to  blame it on polarization--a magnification of the plight of his "people". If affirmative action perks isn't the crutch to balance the playing field, perhaps an entitlement is because those who fail are disenfranchised. The disenfranchised needing entitlements become a going concern for communities and eventually Americans at large.

The notion Americans cannot achieve success without the necessity of a government handout or hand up is slowly blotting out the legacy of the founding fathers who argued whether the federal government should provide for the common defense. If liberals somehow provide equality they will have to do so at the expense of the outcome. As with any competition someone will do better, and since the criteria liberals use for inequality is one of outcome, they will not be satisfied until there no longer is competition and socialism reigns supreme. Conservatives need to illuminate the base and Americans if they hope to push back the slow deliberate liberal glacier.